SPAM? A LOT!

So, umm…

Okay, so…

Umm…

See, umm… There seems to be this website somewhere called “glmux.com”…

I mean, I guess that’s their name, because I see it a lot in e-mail addresses…

Because a lot of different people with that mail server post a lot of comments on the blog posts on my website…

And the comments are really nice

Very nice…very enthusiastic and very complimentary…

Here are just a few recent ones:

“Thanks for a really fantastic blog. It was very helpful. I am just so glad I found this.”

“This is an excellent site! A lot of useful information and handy tips, thank you =)”

“Wonderful website, how do you get all this information? I’ve read a couple of posts on your site and I love your writing style. Thanks a million, keep up the good work.”

“I browsed through this amazing site and there’s so much handy information; saved to my bookmarks.”

“I’m fascinated. I do not think I know anyone who understands just as much about the topic. You need to make a career of it, honestly; awesome blog.”

Seriously, those are all lovely, aren’t they? And I get messages like that just about every day from a wide range of people from glmux.com…

Of course, you don’t need to look for those comments on the blog posts in my website. Because they’re not there. Because you know how this story plays out…

When I saw the first of these lovely compliments, shortly after my website first launched, I was so thrilled! I either Skyped with or phoned my fabulous website designer, who is my forever web master/guru, and I probably said words to the effect of “They like me! They really like me!”

And there was a pause. In hindsight, I recognize it as a sad pause. And I heard my brilliant web master say, “Oh, honey, that’s spam.”

And I was, like, What?

“It’s spam.”

And I was, like, You mean they say that to everyone? And she was, like, Yeah, because it’s spam.

So now I go through the e-mail notifications I receive every day announcing that comments have been made on my blog posts, and I mark the ones that are spam as “Spam.”

And I do read them. Unless, of course, they’re in the Cyrillic alphabet. And there’s a little voice inside me that says, and probably always will say, “Gosh, maybe these are real people and not machines, and even though it’s their job to send out spam messages, maybe they did take a moment to read my blog post and maybe they really did find it charming or inspiring or funny…”

Well, I imagine I’ll get a lot of comments from glmux.com about this particular post, huh! Some may not convey great enthusiasm about what I’ve written this time, huh!

And some, I can promise you, will have absolutely atrocious grammar and syntax. Seriously, the ones I quoted above? I got so tired of typing “[sic],” I just went ahead and corrected them all; gmlux.com, you really should consider hiring a proofreader.

Because you know those silly spammers seriously have no sense of the significance of the superb semicolon…

And absolutely no appreciation of alliteration, apparently…

2 thoughts on “SPAM? A LOT!”

  1. michaelmichael

    Dearest Heidi,
    I don’t know whether to be surprised by your latest blog, laugh, or be angry for you. Spam in any incarnation is vile and unnecessary. There are myriad people who love your work and adore you. I know because I’m one of them. One of many, I’ve asked around…and I’m still waiting on the sequel(s).

    • Heidi MastrogiovanniHeidi Mastrogiovanni

      Darling Michael, I just adore you, toujours! Thank you so much for being such a dear and fabulous friend-who-is-like-family. Lala’s next incarnation with be unleashed on the world on September 4th. Can’t wait to celebrate with you! xoxoxo

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